


Takes One to Know One

by FeralScribe



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: AU where Bren never left the Volstrucker, Bren mad, Cigarettes, Hate Sex, LuciBren, M/M, Mild torture, and became the mage that helped Lucien with the ritual, except this takes place before that, more like Hate Pillow Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:29:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26579113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeralScribe/pseuds/FeralScribe
Summary: Bren couldn't believe his luck and misfortune when the tome he had been searching for turned up in the hands of a tomb-robbing tiefling. Lucien promised to give him the book, but only if Bren helped him with a certain ritual first. They've been working together to decipher it for weeks, and with both their self-righteous egos clashing, the tension has only been building. In Bren's attempt to do something about it, things didn't quite go as planned and now he has to deal with the consequences...
Relationships: Bren Aldric Ermendrud/Lucien
Comments: 21
Kudos: 71





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Midnigtartist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnigtartist/gifts).



> Look, [Midnigtartist](https://midnigtartist.tumblr.com/post/629375967270469632/bren-and-lucien-live-in-my-head-rent-free) started it, and as soon as hatefucking got mentioned this concept lodged itself in my head and wouldn't budge until I wrote it down and shared it. So here you go, the start of a Reluctant-Allies-to-Lovers story that I am not pursuing beyond this point. Infer from it what you will, continue it if you want, or go ask Midnigt for more art.

Bren sat with his elbows propped on his knees, slumped forward in a posture that Master Ikithon would not approve of. The air was warm and sweat trickled down his bare back. His brow was furrowed in a hard frown. He had had plenty of reasons to frown lately, but this frown carried the harshness of self-loathing and frustration to it.

“Hey,” came the voice from beside him. “You can do that thing where you light your hands on fire whenever you feel like it, right?”

There were plenty of things Bren could do, even without his spell components, which were all in his belt and his pack somewhere on the floor. He spoke the words and snapped his fingers and his fingertips ignited with arcane fire.

“Thanks.” A lavender-skinned hand reached up and stuck the tip of a cigarette into the flames. Lucien leaned up to take a puff so it would light properly, then laid himself back down on the bed.

Bren extinguished his hands and scowled. “Do you have to smoke that in here?” he asked. He wrinkled his nose with a pointed cough. “It reeks.”

Lucien took another drag of the cigarette. He exhaled right in Bren’s direction. “Of all people, I didn’t expect _you_ to have a problem with smoke.”

“My fire burns _clean_ ,” Bren said. “No smoke.”

“Yeah, well, the smoke is half the fun of these, so just don’t breathe in so much.” Lucien brought the cigarette to his lips once more. “Or you can just leave. If you can walk.”

Bren’s frown deepened. He was sore, yes, but he had been through worse. What stung most was his pride. Lucien had tricked him, used a spell that Bren knew very well to make him more pliant, agreeable, vulnerable. But it wasn’t just that. Bren had magically manipulated plenty of people over the years. He knew he couldn’t suggest that people do something that was completely against their nature. Deep down he was wondering if, given different circumstances, he wouldn’t have submitted voluntarily. He clenched his fists.

“Staying then, are you?” A plume of smoke drifted across Bren’s shoulders. “Well in case you haven’t noticed yet, I’m not much of a cuddler, if that’s what you’re expecting.”

“I expect nothing from you,” Bren said flatly. “Not in this regard.”

Lucien chuckled. “I’m still going to hold up my end of the bargain,” he said. “Once we’re done the ritual, you get that big special book and I’ll bring you back something nice from the city.” His cigarette was over half gone down. He flicked the ashes off the side of the bed. “Doubt they’ll have a gift shop, but I know what you’re after. Just a sample, something you can take back to that fancy workshop of yours so you can do whatever it is you do to stuff like this.”

That was the only reason Bren had stayed on with Lucien this long, the promise of knowledge. The Cerberus Assembly could obsess over the Cricks’ magic all they wanted. Bren was after something more. Manipulating potential and time and gravity were all well and fine, but he wanted to shape reality itself. Once he had brought all of Exandria to its knees, he could then help them rise up together into a better future. But in order to do that, he had to work with the likes of Lucien and his band of plundering Blood Hunters. They were the sort that Lady DeRogna would gladly throw in prison or personally execute for how they treated the spoils they scavenged from graves and ruins.

And yet they had found the tome, the one Bren had hoped was real and did, in fact, contain the knowledge he sought. Lucien bragged often about how they had come across it, but the details shifted enough with each retelling that Bren highly doubted that even half of the story was true. Bren hated the smug tiefling. He wasn’t entirely without charm, clearly, or so many of his old Order wouldn’t have followed him when he left, but his position of leadership had gone to his head. _Nonagon_ , they called him, like he was some prophet or avatar of whatever twisted gods he served now, if he served any at all. Much like Bren, Lucien appeared to play well with others for the sole purpose of furthering his own goals.

Bren decided to just lie down. He positioned himself at the edge of the bed, his back to Lucien, sheets tucked up protectively around him. His thighs hurt. The frown hadn’t left his face since the moment he recovered from his climax. At least Lucien had given him that. Selfish though he was, part of being a good leader was making sure everyone in his group got what they needed. Bren detested the thought of being considered part of Lucien’s group. He wasn’t a Tomb Taker. He was a _Volstrucker_. One of the best, too. He could kill Lucien and take the tome, as he had killed so many others and taken what the Empire needed from them. However, if Lucien was so insistent on going to the city himself…

“You alright, Firebug?”

Bren rolled his eyes at Lucien’s stupid nickname for him. “ _Ja, Kätzchen_ , I am fine.” He couldn’t see Lucien’s face, but he could feel the sheets shifting from Lucien swishing his tail in annoyance. He smirked. It had only taken him a couple days in Lucien’s presence to come up with a suitably insulting nickname for him that seemed friendly in most other contexts, but the way he said it and the way he meant it were anything but. It was diminutive where Lucien tried to make himself grand, cutesy where Lucien tried to be intimidating, turned Lucien’s cruelty and cunning into the clumsy and ultimately harmless outbursts of a kitten.

But the main reason for the nickname was so Bren could ignore how much those traits drew him to Lucien, and instead he could tell himself he pitied the tiefling for thinking so much of himself when he was really nothing compared to Bren’s power and potential.

And yet Bren had found himself in bed with Lucien. Originally he just wanted to put him in his place, but when he analyzed his feelings he found he truly was intrigued by him. There was no affection in his attraction though, only physical lust and professional curiosity. It made this easier. He knew he wasn’t in danger of becoming emotionally attached to Lucien. This was just a way to ease his tension, let off some steam, take a little break from the steady march to his goal. He was a man with needs, after all. Except then Lucien had turned the situation around the moment Bren had let his guard down for a second and made him enjoy it. Or had Bren enjoyed it of his own accord? He crossed his arms more tightly across his chest and gritted his teeth. _No._

“You’re not alright,” Lucien stated. There was no care or concern in his voice, and Bren didn’t expect any from him. “What, did I not live up to your expectations? Or are you mad because I exceeded them?”

Bren didn’t answer. When Lucien put a hand on his shoulder he shrugged it off like a bothersome fly.

“Ah, so it’s the latter.” Lucien’s grin was audible. “Didn’t think a lowly tiefling would fuck you like that, did you?” There was a pause, then the air became thick with the stench of scorched tobacco and herbs again. “Not my fault you’ve never branched out from fucking other humans before. You capital folk think you’ve already got the best of everything and you never even consider there’s something better out there, something more exciting. You’re welcome for proving you wrong.”

Bren sat up sharply, his eyes burning. “You are an _Arschloch_ , do you know that?”

Lucien smirked, showing off his pointed fangs. “I think that’s what you like about me, Firebug.” He took a final drag of his cigarette then flicked the butt onto the floor. “Takes one to know one, after all. And now I’ve proved, at least to myself, that you don’t have a literal stick up your arse. Y’know, we were actually wondering if they castrated you when you become an assassin so you have one less distraction while you’re on the job. Zoran owes me a gold piece.”

“And _I_ was told that Blood Hunters are little better than the undead that they hunt because every time they draw their own blood they lose a little of their soul,” Bren spat. “Does that mean I’m sharing a bed with a dead man? If not, you know even without my spell components I can make it that way _very easily_.”

“Oh ho! There’s your fire, _Volstrucker_. I was worried I’d somehow snuffed it out.” Lucien swished his tail smugly. “As I said, you and your lot think you’ve got everything figured out, what with your structure and your libraries full of things people already knew.” He grinned. “And yet _I_ found your precious tome by sheer happenstance. Goes to show that no matter how much you learn or how many people you slaughter, there’s always going to be one bastard who’s luckier than you, and that might be your downfall someday.” He drew one long fingernail down the side of his neck. “Oh, and keep in mind that I _always_ have my spell components with me.” He nicked himself and the blood on his nail immediately froze into a drop of ice. “I’d be curious to see which prevails, fire or ice.”

Bren turned so he could fully glare at Lucien. “Is that an invitation to kill you?”

Lucien laughed. “It’s an invitation to _try_. But remember, you need someone to go into that city for you. If you could do this on your own — and if you _wanted_ me dead that badly — you could have burnt us all to dust and taken that book by now.” His red eyes gleamed impishly. “You _need_ me.” He put his arms behind his head and sprawled himself on the bed with his legs apart. “And based on the events of the past hour I’d say you _want_ me even more.”

Bren had had enough. He pounced on Lucien, pinning him down on the bed with one hand firmly grasping Lucien’s crossed wrists. Before Lucien could utter one of his accursed maledicts, Bren clapped a hand over his mouth. “Listen,” he said. His voice quavered with his barely-contained rage. “None of this was because I like you. It was not because I _want_ you. This was a fluke. And furthermore, while I _did_ instigate this little… _tryst_ , you tricked me. What you did was _unfair_.”

Lucien cocked an eyebrow and made a noise behind Bren’s palm that clearly meant, “ _You thought_ I _would play fair?_ ”

It was then that Bren noticed something shifting under him. He glanced down and, sure enough, it appeared that Lucien was enjoying this more than Bren had hoped. Bren sighed with an annoyed growl. “ _Du bist erbärmlich_ ,” he hissed. He dug his fingertips into Lucien’s cheek. “ _Hörzu_ , make no mistake, I do not like you. When this is all over I do not intend to leave loose ends. If you can find a way to make yourself useful I might make an exception, but not if I think you’re going to manipulate me every chance you get.” He leaned down until Lucien’s wide red eyes were mere inches from his own. “You can start by proving yourself to me now. You cannot keep me charmed permanently, and right now _you_ are at _my_ mercy. So either you will do something more productive with that tongue, or I will burn it out of your fucking mouth. Understand me?”

For a brief second, there was genuine fear in Lucien’s eyes. Bren grinned. He muttered under his breath and flames sparked at his fingertips, not enough to burn Lucien but enough to make his fear grow stronger. Lucien cowered beneath him. His tail flicked in anger, but he made no attempt to struggle.

“Very good,” Bren said. “Now, are you going to play nicely?” He shifted his hand so his thumb was pressed firmly over Lucien’s lips.

Lucien scowled at him. After a moment of staring up at Bren with furious loathing, he opened his mouth and sucked at Bren’s thumb.

Bren smirked. “There, see? No reason to be so—“

Then Lucien bit him, turning his head sharply so he got Bren’s thumb between his fangs. He chuckled in self-satisfaction when Bren yelped.

“ _Du mieser Wixxer_ ,” Bren snarled, examining his injured hand. A drop of blood welled from where one fang has broken the skin. He slapped his palm over Lucien’s mouth again. “You think you are a funny guy, eh? Ha ha. You really are a kitten. Full of mischief and delusions of grandeur, but realize that if you are a kitten then I am a tiger, and I could eat you in one bite.”

Lucien’s lips curled up. His eyes glinted with intrigue.

Bren mentally thumbed through the spellbook that was among his possessions he had tucked away in his pack. Clearly he was not getting through to Lucien the way he wanted. The damned tiefling took every threat as either a challenge or some sort of dirty talk. He needed to be taught a lesson. Then Bren remembered. It was such a simple spell, one of the first they had taught him, years and years ago, when Lucien would have still been clinging to his mother’s skirts. He hadn’t needed it in so long, since he could generate its effect in so many other ways now. But it didn’t even require a gesture to make it work, only the right words.

“Let’s see how you like having _your_ head fucked with,” Bren said with a menacing grin. “After all, I think I prefer you with fear in your eyes…”

Lucien was already nervous before Bren even finished casting the spell. Then it took root in his mind and his expression turned to one of true terror. He thrashed and struggled, but Bren held him firm. He tried to scream for help, but Bren pressed his hand harder into his mouth until his fingernails nearly bit through Lucien’s skin.

The spell was supposed to last a minute. Bren had hoped Lucien wouldn’t be able to break it before then, although he was aware of how strong his mind could be and wasn’t surprised when the effect wore off sooner. He was satisfied. In fact he was a little aroused himself. Lucien glowered at Bren. He whipped his tail up to strike him in the back of the head.

“Now we are even,” Bren said. He took his hand off Lucien’s mouth and moved it up to continue holding Lucien’s arms down. “So, have you learned your lesson?”

“Fuck you,” Lucien spat. “At least when I messed with you I made you _happy_. Didn’t know that would offend you so much.”

“What would _actually_ make me happy is if you shut up and did as you were told for once,” Bren retorted. “Why must you always be such a…a _little shit_ about everything?”

Lucien shrugged. “Life’s more fun that way. Besides, if I did what I was told all the time, I’d be _you._ ” He whipped Bren in the back of the head again. He grinned when Bren winced and hissed in pain. “Look at you, so concerned with being all stoic and mysterious and _clever_ that you can’t even have fun properly. Even when you finally admitted what you wanted it was just ‘We are going to your room and we are going to do something about this before it gets out of hand.’ Not the worst way I’ve ever been propositioned, but _still_.”

Bren drooped his head and sighed. He sat back. “I…am disciplined, _ja._ You do not get as far in my line of work without it.”

“Which is why we assumed they just cut your balls off,” Lucien said. He rubbed his wrists where Bren’s grip had left darker purple marks. “But you want me to be useful, I don’t want to die…” He stroked his fingertips up Bren’s cock. Bren gritted his teeth and hardened his frown. Lucien winked. “What do you say?”

Bren thought for a moment. He weighed his options, the pros and cons of snapping Lucien’s neck just to get out of this. Then Lucien stroked him again. He sighed, though it carried a growl of exasperation. He leaned back over Lucien. “I’d say, be a good little Tomb Taker and bend over for me,” he said, echoing the words Lucien has used in his charming spell. “You’re going to take it and you’re going to like it.”

Lucien pouted. He rolled his eyes and turned over when Bren allowed him. He put his ass up in the air, though he crossed his arms on the pillow and rested his chin on them. He made a small noise of annoyance when Bren tugged his tail to position him better. “Y’know, if you wanted to top that badly you could have just asked.”

Bren reached for the jar Lucien had left on his bedside table, lid hastily dropped on top of it. He coated himself in the lubricating substance. It only took him a little work to get himself ready. “Lucien?”

“Yeees?” Lucien responded with sarcastic sweetness.

“Just shut up.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucien suggests he and Bren take their relationship to the next level, but Bren just isn't ready for that kind of commitment.
> 
> Or, "What happens when you honeypot a tiefling cult leader long enough to catch feels and he asks you to join his hive mind."

Lucien nibbled Bren’s jaw. Bren hadn’t had the time or energy to shave recently, but aside from the potential of having a beard to keep his face warm in this dreadful snowscape, he had to admit he enjoyed the feeling of Lucien’s teeth grazing past the short stiff hair. He stroked Lucien’s tail with a loose fist. He flicked his thumb over the peaks of the tail’s ridges. Lucien grew harder against his hip.

Then the bastard went and ruined things by talking, as usual. “Wouldn’t it be more fun if you could feel what I’m feeling?” Lucien asked.

Bren scowled. “Why?”

Lucien shrugged and nipped Bren again. “You could know what it’s like to have a tail, and what it’s like to have someone touching it the way you are now.”

“No thanks,” Bren said. “If I go my whole life not knowing that feeling but I get to keep my own free will, I shall consider that a fair trade.”

Lucien pouted with a huff. The warmth of his breath caressed down Bren’s chest. “You’re not even a _little_ curious?”

“ _Kätzchen_ ,” Bren said, “I thought we agreed we would keep the fucking around inside each other’s heads to a minimum.”

“It wouldn’t be like that.” Lucien cupped Bren’s cheek and shifted up to nibble his ear instead. Bren melted to his ministrations for a heartbeat. “We would be connected, combining our intellects and wits. We could be so much more than we are now.”

Bren scoffed and shrugged Lucien off him. “You, me, and the rest of your devotees.”

Lucien swished his tail. “I mean, I _did_ promise them…” He shifted away from Bren on the bed. When Bren had crafted this place he had made sure to conjure a bed large enough for the both of them to have their space if Lucien decided not to be in his own room. Not even five minutes after they had finished their meal and retired to their chambers, Lucien had slipped in, stripped, and made himself at home by Bren’s side. While Bren had been growing fonder of the tiefling, this new development in Lucien’s powers, as well as other things Bren had read in that accursed tome, had him worried.

“You could just _tell_ me what you are thinking,” Bren pointed out. “Instead of needing to…to weave me into this mental web of yours.” A web where Lucien could tug all the strings. The rest of the Tomb Takers seemed thrilled at the thought, but Bren wasn’t keen on playing puppet to anyone ever again.

“I could say the same to you,” Lucien said, rolling over to turn his back to Bren. “Damn your stoicism sometimes. Doing everything by yourself proves nothing except that you’re stubborn. For the record, this offer means I _trust_ you. I don’t _need_ you to do it, I just… _want_ you to.”

Bren rubbed at his scruffy jaw. “If only I could trust the offer in return.”

Lucien glared at Bren over his shoulder. “After everything we’ve been through? After everything we’ve _done_ together? And not just in terms of our work. _This!_ ” He gestured wildly with one hand. “You’ll trust me in your bed where I could easily slit your throat or smother you with a pillow or bite your cock off, but that’s it?”

Bren sighed. He curled himself around Lucien and held him to his chest. Lucien squirmed at first and whacked Bren with his tail, but Bren pet him gently until he grudgingly relaxed. “Lucien, I am merely…concerned. I wish to bring the city back as much as you do, but not if it’s going to cost you too dearly. You’re… You’re becoming more like _them_.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” Lucien turned in Bren’s arms to meet his eyes. “They gave me these abilities, these _gifts_ , and you’re saying I shouldn’t use them?”

“I just don’t want you to lose who you are. I’ve spent over a decade working with the Cerberus Assembly. I know what happens to those who grow intoxicated by their own power.”

Lucien sneered. “I’m not some stuffy old city spellslinger,” he said. “I was _chosen_ for this.”

“All the more reason it could go to your head.” Bren nudged his forehead to Lucien’s horn. “I trust _you_ , Lucien, as you are. Or were. I don’t trust the Nonagon.”

“I _am_ the Nonagon.” Lucien cast off Bren’s embrace and got out of bed. The eyes on his skin glowed faintly in the dim light. “You yourself once said it was probably for the best that _I_ found the tome instead of someone who would abuse it without a second thought. Yes, I’ve changed, but these gifts are part of me now and I plan to use them as they were intended. All I wanted was to include you. If you won’t accept my offer, that’s fine. But if you’re going to treat me like some corrupt politician on the brink of madness, that’s a problem.”

Bren slumped on the bed. He knew why Lucien was so keen to get inside his mind. He was afraid of betrayal. He rarely talked about his past or how he came to be the leader of the Tomb Takers, but Bren could smell paranoia at a hundred paces. Everyone in the Assembly reeked of it. Whether it was something that happened in Lucien’s past or if Lucien was simply worried that his followers would abandon him the way he had taken them and abandoned his Order, it wasn’t clear. But Lucien wanted to be absolutely certain that Bren wasn’t hiding something from him, and Bren had plenty to hide.

“Come back to bed,” Bren said. “Or go back to your own. We both need rest. We’ll reach A2 in a couple days and even your great powers won’t save you from being too exhausted to think.”

Lucien scowled. “You would gladly take the Nonagon, that tainted untrustworthy fiend, into your bed?”

Bren held out his hand. “I would gladly accept Lucien into my bed. Should the Nonagon come along with him, I will not turn them both away.” He gave Lucien a pleading look. It had worked on people he had needed to manipulate before, but now he used it in earnest, mostly. “Please, Lucien. We can talk more in the morning.”

Lucien crossed his arms. His tail lashed side to side. Then he sighed. “You’re a right pain in my arse sometimes, Firebug.”

Bren smiled. “Someone has to be. If you were surrounded by nothing but sycophants kissing your boots all day, the power would _really_ go to your head.”

“That’s fair,” Lucien said with a chuckle. For another moment, he stood there, all eyes on Bren. When Bren didn’t relent, Lucien took his hand and allowed him to pull him back into an embrace. “I’m still cross with you,” he added.

“Oh, I am aware.” Bren groped Lucien’s ass. “But I think I know how to earn a little of your favor back…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know I said I wasn't going to write any more about these two, but there's no episode this week and I had _ideas_ , okay?


End file.
